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Falling asleep is getting harder and harder. Is it the coffee, the stress or my troubles that torture me tonight? Images of past, present and future are blended into a painful pattern that keeps popping on my mind no matter how much I strive to neglect it. What I fear the most, though, is the coming of my dreams. The way my subconscious holds on my will and choices, frightens me to death. How can I feel ease and comfort in a dreamy world, when its achievement eludes my power?

I am still swirling around in discomfort within my comfortable brand new bed. The hour is past, my body protests for rest and my eyes ache from pressure. It is impossible to sleep tonight, yet I must insist. The darkness of the room can not hide my restlessness. I hear the breath of Morpheus next to my pillow, but I am not capable to reach him. Stretching my arm, what I sense is pure nothingness and freezing cold.

I am not cold either outwardly or inwardly. I have a complete life and, I may dare say, many moments of happiness to cling on. What is missing and steals my peace, frankly I do not know. But, there must be something or I would be dancing with the stars by now. Speaking of which, why have I not dreamed of this image ever before? How come and my dreams nail me down to earth and play vicious games with my mind?

Tonight, if I eventually manage to fall asleep, I will travel to the moon. I will have no gravity to keep me down. I will have no wings either, but I will be able to fly away carelessly. This can happen in dreams… and light, surely, there must be ample light, and joy, and laughter. Yes, a happy dreamy world of my own. No restrictions, no norms, no pain and worries, just love and airy creatures dancing around ceaselessly.

I am still swirling around, though, having a stupid smile upon my face. Why am I smiling? Stop that. Stop thinking. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Ah, impossible!

Touching Fear

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I can feel the moisture upon your cheek
Even though it is dark in here
Like a blind man I don’t know what I seek
Before touching your tear
I dare not ask you what the reason might be
For I sense my deepest fear
It is the parting of you, the leaving of me
That I can not bare to hear.
You have to grant your needing needs
To spin once more the living gear
The only garnered from my seeds
You burn my pretty dear
I wish you love, I wish you luck
Believe that I am sincere
No matter how my soul is struck
I’ll be forever near.

On a Love Strike

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His eyes darker than the dark
His voice sweeter than the lark
Amazed as I could ever be
The morning found me.
Trembling body I have still
What the heart denies to kill
Possess my bitter thought
Yet I should have fought.
A flood of demanding passion
Soon becomes out of fashion
Repressed by the rays of sun
There goes the fun.
Shadows of a vivid dream
Lost within a light beam
He and I look alike
Marching on a love strike.

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